Saturday, 11 May 2013

Zero Screentime Wala

Come to Sri Lanka, It's Nice!
What's in a name? Well in some cultures, the longer the name the more respected you are in society (basically, the more names you have, the more posher you are!). Taumata­whakatangihanga­koauau­o­tamatea­turi­pukakapiki­maunga­horo­nuku­pokai­whenua­kitanatahu (I kid you not!) is the Māori name for a hill in New Zealand, which has gained fame for being the longest place name found in any English-speaking country (go on, have a go yourself at saying it!). Although others will always shorten a given name for ease of pronunciation, those that have long names will quietly boast whenever someone asks for their full name (it's quite the opposite for Indian call centre workers - they have long names to begin with and shorten it to Sam/John/Mike/Sally/Susan/Tom/Mary...). Quite a few movies over the years have gained infamy for have particularly long titles. The Assassination of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford, Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex But Were Afraid to Ask, The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert and
The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension are but a number of films with titles that film poster designers would have a challenge fitting in (you could always shorten a film's title ala DDLJ or K3G...). In India, you'll normally find people from the south with very long names. A certain driver of a brown sports car from Dhamaal is one such person (who I assume is from Sri Lanka - he has no name in the film nor is the actor who plays him listed in the credits). Maybe this driver with a long name (wait till you see how long his name is!) might consider starring in a remake of a film with a long name... (where he discovers the delights of India and reports back to his motherland...) Aditya Shrivastav (a.k.a Adi; played by Arshad Warsi) and Manav Shrivastav (played by Javed Jaffrey) demand the driver stops his car which is approaching, and somehow Adi manages to land on top of the car which shocks our driver (ay yo!) The brothers ask whether the driver can drop them to Goa (where fortune lies under a big 'W'...), who is more than willing (never let hitchhikers in your car!).

These once rich hitchhikers weren't the ones who were psychos...
Adi thanks him for the lift, and asks the driver how long it will take to reach Goa. The driver says "We will reach as we finish introducing our names." (the brothers therefore think it won't take long to get to Goa). So Manav introduces himself and Adi, and asks the driver for his good name (you wish you hadn't Manav!). Brace yourselves, here we go... "Iyer." "Iyer." "Venu Gopal Iyer." "Venu Gopal Iyer." "Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer." "Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer." "Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer. Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer. Ekaparam Pilaparam Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer. Trichipalli Ekaparam Pilaparam Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer. (hilariously, Adi who by this point is loosing his rag, stops repeating the driver's recitation of his name quite early!) Srinivasan Trichipalli Ekaparam Pilaparam Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer. Rajshekar Srinivasan Trichipalli Ekaparam Pilaparam Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer.  Shivavenkatah Rajshekar Srinivasan Trichipalli Ekaparam Pilaparam Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer." (the look of shock on Manav's face is a sight to behold!) Some time passes, but the driver still hasn't quite finished saying his name. "Srinath Attapattu Jaisurya Shriramakrishna Shivavenkata  Ramshekhara Srinivasan Trichipalli Ekaparam Pilaparam Coimbatore Chinna Swami Muthu Swami Venu Gopal Iyer." (phew, everyone take a deep breath, he's finished!) If you want to see how funny this is for yourself, then check it out below!


Adi lost his rag at the driver who liked to brag - surely the fool was made fun of at school!
Manav then tells Adi "Adi, is he telling us his name, or reading out the telephone directory of Chennai?" (looks like the name of every call centre worker down south!) At this point I got thinking, wouldn't it have been easier if the driver simply said his full name in one go, rather than repeat the full name each time after the addition of a new name? (in that case the driver would have only have taken them halfway to Goa...) But the driver isn't finished, as he continues reciting as Adi in his frustration demands the driver be quiet, and to stop the car (Adi was better off his brother reciting the alphabet backwards to him!). Adi accuses the driver of being mad, and that he doesn't want to go anywhere with him (a hitchhiker getting angry with the driver? that's a first surely!). Adi gets physical with him, and asks why he has such a long name. The driver hilariously replies "Sir, no sir this is only my pet name." After Adi threatens to hit him with his shoe, Manav asks the driver "If this is your pet name, then what is your real name?", who is more than willing to tell him (the clearly scared driver begins slowly reciting as the brothers leave the car!). Maybe our man with a long pet name might like to star in a film remake where we discover his real name. Which is Ace Ventura. Kulatunga Ace Ventura. Pushpakumara Kulatunga Ace Ventura... (just like his pet name, his real name contains the names of actual Sri Lankan cricketers...)

He's the burping, farting, snorting, fitting image of the mad

1 comment:

  1. Movie Dhamal was certainly hilarious! The scene of long named character was even more funny. the spice to the scene was added by the fantastic acting of frustrated lad by Arshad Warsi. Undoubtedly the actor who played the south Indian character must be appreciated for his memory, but the real fun was added by Arshad Warsi with is desperate and agitated expressions. Love the movie for sure!

    Unfortunately they did not continue the momentum in the sequel! :(

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...